My thoughts last night

So, obviously I do not update this blog very often (or my facebook status, or much of anything public). Honestly, I like to keep things to myself and things aren't too exciting anyway :) ! With that being said, I couldn't sleep last night because I couldn't turn my brain off at all. I really wish sometimes I could turn it off as easily as the light switch! A friend of mine posted something about how people are judging her parenting. Usually I just brush these things off, or I think about it and am sad for them and reassure them, but for some reason I couldn't stop thinking about it. This is my thought:

We look at people and in a instant we judge them. It is natural. We think we get a good sense of who they are by what we can access from our knowledge base of that individual or family. What does their house look like, their kids, clothes, car, how do they speak and a million different little subtle things. We see a mother nursing her baby and some think she should go and hide while she is nursing, we see a mother using a bottle and thing she is not doing right because she is using formula, we see a child throwing a fit in the grocery store and ask why they can't control their child, we see a older couple with one or no children and are disappointed, the list goes on and on and on....

Last night I felt bad for the mom who posted her feelings about being judged not because she is a close and dear friend, but because she is a fellow parent. We see the faces of our friends, family, neighbors, strangers and are prone to instantly judge. The Lord looks upon us and instantly thinks and asks how He can HELP us. We are all here to help each other, that doesn't mean agree with each other and have the same opinions, but help. What that means to me is maybe educate, lead by example, love, be understanding, forgiving, be supportive, smile, love etc...

The Lord loves each of us SO much and he looks upon us with the same gently love we look upon a newborn baby's chubby cheeks. With love, hope, desire to teach and hope we will follow, desire for us to be ourselves and love what that means, respect, future leadership and excitement for what is to come, what can come.

I would love if Moms (dads too :)) were more supportive of each other instead of judgmental. We are all doing the best we can with the tools we have. We pick up more tools and try to improve our skills along the way, but being mean and judgmental towards each other doesn't help. It does not give us more tools, it gives us water that will rust our tools. Can you imagine how wonderful it would be, how wonderful the community would be if we supported each other instead of trying to justify ourselves and our choices by pointing out why the others parents choice is wrong?

I don't think getting defensive and telling people the million reasons your kids are great and why you are wrong for judging me helps either. We love our kids because they are ours. They have their faults, but yes, we think they are the most talented, adorable, smart, fun-loving kids on the face of the planet - and we should. We are their parents, the ones who are in their corner. But that doesn't mean we don't/can't think your kids aren't talented, adorable, smart and fun-loving too.

I believe if we looked at others, in general, with the love they deserve then the mean and judgmental thoughts wouldn't even appear. If we put our pride and insecurities aside long enough to love we would be so much happier and filled with abundant love to spread.

Those are my thoughts. I hope they made sense. I love my kids, my family and hope I can give love more abundantly too. Please know, in some way, I love you.